I just felt like putting this down. Not sure why. Alcoholism sucks. One thought in my head once in a while is can I really go 15 or more years without drinking - at all? I just can't wrap my head around that one. It's been a little over a year and a half now. I'm happier than I've ever been which is what keeps me sober. I know how I would feel by having that one drink. Not only would I want more I would feel so ashamed, I'd want to drink again and again to escape myself. So I go day by day, literally. I made it through today not even wanting to drink. How about tomorrow? I gave myself one out - it's probably wrong but hey, sue me. The only time I would allow myself to drink is if something horrible happened to one of my children. I would drink myself silly. I would be a basket case anyway - why not just go all the way with it at a time of desperation. I would never really wish anything to happen to my children so that's good. I don't really even want to drink anymore. If my insurance will cover it, I'm going to try that new medication to help me stop smoking. It's called Chantix. It curves the cravings by occupying the part of your brain that nicotine occupies. Also it blocks the effects of nicotine so even if you do smoke your body doesn't get it - basically wasting money. I think I'm ready to quit smoking. I love life. I'm now addicted to loving life, my job, my kids. I want to live as long as I can.
For any alcoholic reading this - there really is life after drinking. It's hard to imagine, I know. Life is what you make of it. If your miserable, stop being miserable. If your happy, keep being happy. It's that simple. I made the decision a long time ago that I didn't want to be miserable. Although it has taken a few years, I finally made it. My new goal, besides quitting smoking, is to get rid of the miserables around me, wackly/SD you know who I'm talking about. That's the hardest part for me. It'll happen. Not sure how, not sure when, but it will.
About Me
- shorty
- A life fulfilled, great childhood, the opportunity to f*#* up and the pleasure of doing so. Making up, breaking up. Living and loving. That's all I've got.
4 comments:
You are awesome, you know that? And yes, I believe you can get rid of that miserable SOB.
Aww shucks. Thanks so much that means a lot to me. You're pretty awsome yourself. It's funny, after I laid into L. about being miserable, you could tell he tried harder not to be. You know the miserable still shined through. lol. Anyway, thanks again. Talk to ya later - Have a great day!!!
hey, i just look up to you. i wish i could be strong enough to give up some shit that messes with my life. kudos. props. all that and a bag of chips.
You're stronger than you know. I think everyone has it in them to change their life around for the better. Of course it's not perfect. I'm not perfect. Ask yourself what you want. That's the hardest part.
Thanks for the compliment.
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