Okay, in my next lifetime, assuming there is one, I am NOT having kids. No way, no how. I will heed the warning so given by my parents and others who already had children.
I love my kids, you know that. I just want peace and quiet in my next life, that's all. I want to sip my sugar and cream with coffee while reading the paper. I want to hear the birds singing in the morning and patiently appreciate the glimpse of sun shining in. I want to read and watch tv uninterrupted whenever I want, not just after the kids' bedtime. I want to be, oh sorry I already am - I mean stay an alcoholic. I want to go out whenever, drink, and not worry about home, the kids, bills, or their well-being. Shit I don't want to worry about my well-being. I don't want to hear Mommy, Mommy, Mommy in my next lifetime. Oh and I want all my money to be my money!!!! No school lunches, no help the kids with homework etc...
Okay, this sounds bad. I want my kids. I love them dearly. If anything happened to them life would cease to exist for me.
Right now I'm just craving a little time with no noise, by myself. I just want to relax, stoned, in a dark room with candles flickering, listening to some of my favorite tunes, a beer in my hand and more in the fridge, ice cold. Did I mention two words: by myself? You get the picture.
Yes, I know I'm bitching. What the hell is this thing blog for anyway? Isn't every conversation with everyone a bitch session...really? Think about it. There is always complaining. We're human. Selfish humans with nothing else on the brain but ourselves and what's good for us. If we didn't complain, we'd have nothing to talk about, laugh about, cry about etc.... It's the strive to do and be better that drives us to complain, bitch, if you will. Of course there's a limit. It's important how we complain also. Throwing a little humor in there helps. I'm not particularly funny, but I do like to laugh about the shit in my wheaties (thanks for that once whackly - still one of my favorites) once in a while. {A little better than horseshit - I use that one a lot.}
I'm rambling. It eases anxiety.
Lesson for today: DON'T HAVE KIDS, DRINK AND GET HIGH OFTEN, AND BITCH YOUR WAY TO A BETTER LIFE
ok now I'm done.
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6 comments:
dude.... i HEAR you! I love this little dude but i wish he were mute... or at least extrememly quiet... and preferabely farther away.. LOL
I feel horrible sometimes feeling that way. Cause like I said if something happen to them I'd feel horrible. Especially now that I'm putting it in writing. Anyway, I'm glad I'm not the only one. Yeah Mute, that would work.
Too bad kids weren't like hamsters. I could buy each of mine one of those wheels to burn off some energy. Take em' out once in a while to play.
i feel for you poor bastards. i do. my sister having a kid at 17 was the best birth control ever invented. i still get that tug at my heart that says someday i want a child, but god knows i am not ready for that shit! i get annoyed in an afternoon with kids around.
i remember this picture in my brain, every time i get to feeling ready to have a kid: winters in minnesota, bundling that damn kid up everytime i wanna or haveta go somewhere, carrying it's heavy ass into the store and back again, even if i just needed a stamp.
seriously, it's the bundling up of the kids that makes me wanna scream. i still remember it very well from babysitting my niece. yuck!
lol! and i guess this is also from my own childhood, cuz one time i had to pee real bad and i had my snowsuit on and didn't wanna deal with going inside and all that, so i sat in a snowbank and peed thru my suit. i was born lazy! hahahha.
and i do understand how you feel, and i completely feel for you, but you also have what other people want so much and can't have. i couldn't afford to keep a kid even if i did have one. and you and whackly are smart, considerate, responsible parents- which is something that seems to be so rare these days.
and try to remember that someone out here, looking in on you and your family wishes she could have that, too.
Thanks, Frankles, for that last sentence. It does put a perspective on things. I am definitely thankful I was able to have two healthy children. Minus some behavioral issues, which ultimately are my fault, I am lucky. And Wackly's little guy - CUTIE!!!!!! I keep kidding around, saying that Miles is probably taller than me by now. Maybe I'm not kidding and just don't know it yet. lol. Thanks again.
Yeah, Miles is 5'5" easy.
Thanks for the advice, but I don't think I will spend all my time drunk and high ...but I will bitch my way to happiness if it's at all possible!
LOL!
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