not working

I thought I was over the lay-off, but an emotional and mental residue remains at times.

I'm still angry over the fact that I actually wanted to be at the job every day, but I knew other people didn't. Other people who surfed the net, had time to complete surveys and shop online while at work, always complained about the job, told me that he/she will do what people asked of them 'when he/she had time', did other jobs while at the job (literally) etc... Seriously? Am I the only one who knew this? Doubt it. So...WTF?
I'm disappointed that I put all of me into this job for 3 years and got absolutely nothing back. It was only about what you weren't doing right. They are in a PANIC...lay off as many people as you possibly can phase. Maybe a great move temporarily...but, of course, not productive in the long run. I try not to take it personally. Unfortunately, or perhaps fortunately, my work ethic is a big part of me. I will go on, finish school and find another job. Not too often in a person's life do you love the job or it's people. I am lucky to have experienced both, just not together. As I ponder, I realize that I am fortunate to have what I have left after losing most everything I knew, not more than a year ago, literally. I lost my house, 2 jobs, my ex, my sobriety, and friends. The only constant in my life is the family. That's all that matters in the end anyway. I am itching for something more and I can't wait to go back to school, buy a house with a new love, and start anew. The kids are doing awsome, getting good grades and most importantly are happy:) What doesn't kill you WILL make you stronger. It's not a myth.