realized this

Thinking and thinking...realized this about my alcoholism:

I was in recovery for 3 yrs. I relapsed, still trying to figure out how to get back to sobriety. There are so many reasons I drink.

Sobriety was absolutely amazing. I was still depressed, but physically I felt better. I felt better about myself.

Gradually, I started thinking about never drinking again. How could I possibly NEVER drink again?

I was addicted to sobriety. Sobriety was my alcohol for those three years. When I didn't feel that anymore, I went back to a drinking.

It took me at least a year before to commit myself to rehab. I have to consider what's available now, without insurance and more on the line.